Metaphors

I am a porcelain doll. Both physically and emotionally. My skin is a creamy white, never brown but never pasty. Porcelain. I am little and weak, I break easily. I pretend to be tough, but it doesn't take much to bring me down. I can't stand rejection. To be alone in a crowded room, even a crowded room of familiar faces, breaks me from the inside out. I like to feel nothing and I do my best to hide my true emotions.

I am a ticking time bomb. With a very short fuse. I explode quickly and violently. I care deeply and passionately, but I often hurt the ones I love. I get angry easily.

I am a kettle of boiling water. I simmer quietly and absorb hurt and pain, but boil over unexpectedly. By the time I boil over, I often forget why the kettle was turned on in the first place. I am prideful and I don't like people to see my pain. I have difficulty asking for help and I like to solve my own problems.

Round 2 with the hairbrush.

The note (see here) worked pretty good with two of my brothers. Well mostly with Branden. They all thought it was amusing, and I definitely saw an improvement. However, I was having a particular difficulty with simply helping Bryce remember. We would have a conversation, while he was brushing his hair, about putting the brush back in the drawer but by the time he finished he would have forgotten entirely. He says he has been remembering pretty good lately, so perhaps he's not the only one forgetting. Here is my new solution:

In case you can't tell what is happening in the above picture, I'll explain. That is my bathroom mirror + my re-discovery of window writers. "Dear Bryce, here is an illustration to help aid your understanding."

Anticipation (Pt. II)

I am anticipating my first kiss.

But not my first kiss ever.

Because I've already had that.

I am anticipating my first kiss.

My first kiss

With the man I am going to spend

The rest of my life with.

I won't know it then.

But that first kiss will be

The beginning to a lifetime.

Forever

It feels like it has been forever since I last posted, but I don't think I have anything to say. Maybe that's okay...

But in the name of doing a blog post anyways, here is a brief update on the happenings around here:

• I'm still working evenings at the pool, and I'm getting lonely. I see people at work, but that isn't the same as hanging out with friends and family and doing what you want to do
• I'm re-modeling my room. Well not totally. I'm spring cleaning, packing things into boxes that don't need to be in my crowded and cluttered room. And I'm moving furniture around to give it a new look.
• I got a second job at the outdoor pool in Leduc, but do to mechanical problems at the pool, I haven't actually started working yet.
• I'm considering becoming a PartyLite consultant. This would be a big step for me, and it makes me nervous. But it is really appealing, so I guess we'll wait and see.

And...that's all I got for now.